Do-It_Yourself-er's. Got any stories?

DamageINC · April 23, 2009

This isn't a tragedy or anything but we've all seen some pretty funny things resulting from people trying to fix their own cars when it probably should have been left in the hands of a pro. This isn't "Funny" but whatever, it made me think of crating a thread on it.

Guy drops off an '02 Explorer Sport (4.0) with a letter that says "Check engine light was on. I disconnected the battery and now the light is off. Please tell check out."

Gee, thanks.

I finally get the light to come on, the code thrown is a P0402 (EGR excessive flow). Pop the hood - it's got a nwe EGR valve, and new EVR, and a new (aftermarket) DPFE.

Check DPFE voltage KOEO and it's at 5.01volts, lol. This is the 2nd aftermarket DPFE I've seen in a week that's been causing 5 volt readngs.

And he botched up his own brake job too by not cleaning anything and he's got about .5mm of pad left on the outside pads, maybe 8-9mm left on the inside.

All the money this guy spent taking guesses and not properly servicing the brakes cost him more than he would have spent had he gone to a dealer in the 1st place.

(I was forced to install an aftermarket DPFE on an Escape not long ago and it returned the very next day with a P1401 code, sure enough - voltage pegged at just over 5 volts again KOEO. Threw ANOTHER one on it and now it's fine... so far. I was curious at first if maybe the cats were plugged and damaging the sensor but backpressure readings are well within spec so I'm jst gonna go out on a limb and say that aftermarket DPFEs are a waste of time and money.)

But I wanna hear some good stories about do-it-yourselfer screwing themselves in the ass when they get in too deep.

I remember once we had a 302 E-van get towed in with the oil pan half hanging from the engine, still. The guy thought we wanted too much money to replace the pan so he decided he'd do it himself on his back in his driveway. ...Yeah. Apparently he spent the better part of 2 days getting it to the point where it was at..

Dave

Aaron · April 23, 2009

Had a customer bring his car into the shop when I was at the indy garage, said he put brakelines on it, and couldn't get a real good pedal, been bleeding the hell out of it.

OK.

Bring car in the shop and put it up on the hoist. Grab everyone once I see what it's all about. "OK sir, step on the brake please!"

HISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS was all we heard as the clear plastic fishtank hose he had used for brake line inflated to about 5-6x it's size.

Another one, a phone call this time.

Customer:"I'm doin my own brakes here"

Me:"Uh huh...."

Customer:"And I got this fuckin' thingamajig"

Me:"Stop right there, and have it towed here."

Customer:"Why?"

Me:"Because if you're callin' it a fuckin' thingamajig, you shouldn't be doing your own brakes."

Guys doing small block tuneups that think the 4 wires on the left side of the cap go to the left side of the engine, and vise-versa.

Rocker arms, you tighten them up till you're out of threads, right?

How about a distributor? Just plunk it in till it goes in all the way, right?

My favorite is the guy that comes into the shop carrying one of those little push-through plugs (looks like a mushroom) that the assembly line puts in the dipstick hole.

Me: "Whatcha got there?"

Customer: "Well, I was just servicing my transmission, and I found this in the pan."

Me: "Cool, but where's the other one?"

Customer: Posted Image

Me: Posted Image

After the customer almost loses it, in a panic because he can't find "the other one", I fill him in on the joke Posted Image

dieseldoc · April 23, 2009

Had a guy with an 03 f-350 6.0 ICP sensor leaking oil. He tried to repair himself and somehow managed to pull the wires right out of one of the connectors at the ficm. He just put them back in and fried his ficm and the wires wouldnt stay in because he broke the locks out when ripping the wires out. He orders and installs a new engine harness. Puts the harness in himself and plugs stuff in. Engine still wont start. Brings it to me. Install the harness in its correct locations and find three bent pins where he just jammed the connectors together. I get everything repaired and try to communicate witht the vehicle and find there is no comms with the ficm, etc, etc. Cust. bought a ficm off of ebay and brings it to me. I told him it has to be programmed I cant do that it has to go to the dealer(where he should have went with it in the first place). He takes it there and the ficm is programmed and the engine runs. Still has the oil leak because after paying me and the dealer he didnt have any money to repair the leak.

Keith Browning · April 23, 2009

My favorite is the rear drum brake shoes in backward... or both primary and both secondary matched together.

You haven't laughed until you had a guy explain that he kept turning the cotter pin and "it won't tighten."

A buddy's father once told me that he never machines the rotors when doing his brakes. He said that the grooves in the rotor increased the surface area contacting the pads. He was a civil engineer. I never asked if it bothered him that there was actually decreased contact... until the pads worn in... I think I would have been asking for an argument so I never went there.

GregKneupper · April 23, 2009

I had a 2001 focus one time that a guy replaced all the coolant hoses and the pcv and crankcase hoses on it. After he did it he noticed that there was an exhaust smell in the cabin of the vehicle. I got it and started to check it out. Well I noticed that for some reason the breather hose that comes off the valve cover to the air box was instead running from the valve cover to the a/c drain on the a/c case. The fumes he was smelling was the crankcase fumes blowing into the case.

Aaron · April 23, 2009

A buddy's father once told me that he never machines the rotors when doing his brakes. He said that the grooves in the rotor increased the surface area contacting the pads. He was a civil engineer. I never asked if it bothered him that there was actually decreased contact... until the pads worn in... I think I would have been asking for an argument so I never went there.

I think I worked with this guy... Posted Image

Jim Warman · April 23, 2009

The cab driver that didn't like my price on front brakes... and installed his own brake pads with the metal side in...

The old guy on a fixed income that thought I was being tight when all I "offered" him was a 10% seniors discount - and he and his son wound up installing the rear drum adjuster screws on the wrong sides - by the time his car wouldn't move any more, even the backing plates were hooped.

The numerous people that learned why fan pulley bolts on some water pumps are spaced "wrong" the hard way... And you shouldn't drill the pulley to make it "work" (up until the motor overheats).

The guy and his teenage son that connected the rubber fuel line from the engine mounted pump to the PCV hose nipple.

FWIW... did you guys know that it is possible to bolt the centre section back into a model T rear axle upside down?

DamageINC · April 23, 2009

I had a 2001 focus one time that a guy replaced all the coolant hoses and the pcv and crankcase hoses on it. After he did it he noticed that there was an exhaust smell in the cabin of the vehicle. I got it and started to check it out. Well I noticed that for some reason the breather hose that comes off the valve cover to the air box was instead running from the valve cover to the a/c drain on the a/c case. The fumes he was smelling was the crankcase fumes blowing into the case.

This one's fucking great.

I kid you not, I remember one time we had a customer DRIVE IN a 1st Gen Expedition stating that the truck didn't steer correctly one day after hitting a curb. He "taped up" the loose parts underneath and drove it in to us so we could check it out. He LITERALLY had a massive wad of duct tape holding the center link to the left inner tie rod and DROVE the damn thing into the shop like that.

Dave

Brad Clayton · April 25, 2009

I had a body shop bring an Escape in with trans issues. Seems they replaced the radiator and mixed up the lower tranny cooler hose with the coolant bypass hose. Thing was a mess and they wanted to flush the coolant mix out of the trans. I said forget about it and told them to bite the bullet and put a trans in it. The decided to flush the trans and flush the trans and flush the trans......and one more flush. Well after about 400 bucks in fluid and flushes they finally bought a unit.

Cetane · April 25, 2009

Even though they arent from my personal experience these pictures are too good to pass up.......

Fabrication Failures

Mekanik · April 25, 2009

I myself don't have any great stories about this, but I do remember a thread on this on the Ford Site.

Some idiot didn't like the price of a set of struts on his car, so he decided he would do it himself.

He came back in a few days later and his car was on a towtruck. The customer was wearing a neck brace and had a black eye. Posted Image

Keith Browning · April 25, 2009

That sounds like a strut spring may have been let loose without being compressed. This is where I really feel bad for do-it-yourselfers because above and beyond the chance to screw up their cars and trucks, they can hurt or kill themselves because they really don't know what they are doing or are aware of the dangers involved. That isn't meant to insult anyone. If you think about our jobs and the vehicles for a moment you should realize how many times each and every day we are exposed to real dangers from chemical exposure to physical injury. Being trained and familiar with not only the product but the proper procedures involved in disassembly and assembly of components is critical.

I applaud anyone who performs their own maintenance and repairs whether it be to save money or be it a hobby and the sheer enjoyment of doing it. There comes a time for most of us when we need to recognize when we are in over our heads or we are simply not equipped with the tools or knowledge to handle the task at hand. Sometimes the tool is the one located between our ears...

Perfect example: When I was in high school I also attended vocational school as part of my Junior and Senior years. One afternoon our instructor screamed so loud the earth shook. One of my fellow students (who I believe was high as a kite) was sitting on the shop floor with an un-caged spring brake chamber between his legs while he was loosening the clamp nut. Definitely a Darwin Award contender.

Jim Warman · April 25, 2009

I recall a multi-million dollar lawsuit from several years ago.... a man and his son were "tinkering" with an automotive, lead-acid battery and it exploded. I don't recall the award but it was the battery manufacturer that was found to be at fault...

Now, we see batteries festooned with warnings.... who reads them?

We live in a politically correct world.... here, we reward stupidity....

Jim Warman · April 25, 2009

I nearly shit myself when I checked my e-mail.. whilke it isn't DIY, it might as well be. Gleaned from iATN

William from Pennsylvania writes:

I am sorry to post such a bad question. How in the &^%$ do you replace the left front marker bulb. we got the top screws out however this assembly can not be removed. please help

TECHNICAL INFORMATION

Engine:

4.9 L / 300 CID / 6 cyl / Gas / OHV

Fuel:

Fuel Injection

Ignition:

Distributor-Breakerless

Trans:

5-speed Standard Transmission

Mileage:

85,000 mi

VIN:

1FTDF15Y4R

Affected Item:

LF MARKER ASSEMBLY

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My initial urge was to reply "look"....

In retrospect, I get the feeling that the real question is "OK, now I have the craftsman super wowee deluxe to set... what do I do?

mchan68 · April 25, 2009

I myself don't have any great stories about this, but I do remember a thread on this on the Ford Site.

Some idiot didn't like the price of a set of struts on his car, so he decided he would do it himself.

He came back in a few days later and his car was on a towtruck. The customer was wearing a neck brace and had a black eye.

I don't personally think that to be very funny for customer to have sustained an injury like that. But sadly, some people do need to learn the hard way.

The vehicle in question wouldn't happen to have been a Taurus or Windstar, would it?

The reason I ask, is because of one such incident a couple years back, when a fellow tech in my shop was in the process of replacing springs on a Taurus. The spring was caged in the wall mounted spring compressor, when it let go, it flew half way across the shop, narrowly missing my legs, where I was, in the middle of changing a tire on the tire machine.

That incident put him on workman's comp. He never returened to work.

Mekanik · April 25, 2009

The last shop I worked , they loved to have me talk to customers and tell them how to fix thier own cars(so they can save some money and avoid paying me). There were several times when after talking to the guy for a minute, I would say,

"I'm not telling you anymore. You are going to end up hurting yourself or someone else when you try to do this your self. Then I will be liable because I led you down that path. "

Like some moron that wants to take apart the steering shaft on his Expedition and drill holes in the U-joints to install grease fittings. Or the guy that thinks he will replace his CV boots himself, but does not know what a steering knuckle is.

mchan68 · April 25, 2009

Here's my list of DIY fuck ups.

-Guys with Taurus 3.0L OHV V6s. Change the belt. Change the tensioner and idler. STILL squeaking away, despite LIBERAL amounts of belt dressing on the NEW belt. Drop a CMP and synchro, and see you later in the movies. How many of you guys have come across those? Although, a few years back, I had one that had a SEVERE squeaking noise originating from the engine that turned out to be something different. Like mentioned above, the vehicle also had LIBERAL amounts of belt dressing slathered all over. It turned out that the roller lifter guide let go, causing damage to cylinder #4 intake lifter and an almost flatted cam lobe. Interestingly, simply removing the drive belt and running the engine would've eliminated EVERYTHING to do with the belt drive as the source of the noise.

-Focuses are very cheap and cheesy vehicles to begin with. But try doing your own set of pads and rotors, and it helps to actually screw in the 7mm allen sliders in, STRAIGHT.

-On the subject of Focuses, I've seen more than my share of DIYer fuckups, in futile attempts to replace their own ignition lock cylinders. A couple of which, resulted in entire column replacements because the DIYer(s) drilled too far.

-Although not DIYer, I remember an Aerostar coming in years ago for an engine misfire, even after a "tune-up" was done at Canadian Tire. Not only was the firing order not correct, but TWO spark plugs weren't even replaced!!! I'm sure you guys can figure out which two.

Fredsvt · April 25, 2009

I've seen two things where I used to work, at a fleet shop/limo company.

One guy we nicknamed "poof" because he decided the best way to check rear airlift shocks for leaks was to jump the compressor on, and lift the car. It made it just over head height before both shocks exploded.

The other guy decided he wanted to do struts in a car and removed the center nuts on the shafts while the car was on the ground, and he lifted it. I was glad I was 4 bays away as the springs came out from under the car and folded both fenders outward when they did.

Both guys were let go after these incidents, as they were hired by a manager that left. (who was obviously clueless)

Clark · April 26, 2009

Perfect example: When I was in high school I also attended vocational school as part of my Junior and Senior years. One afternoon our instructor screamed so loud the earth shook. One of my fellow students (who I believe was high as a kite) was sitting on the shop floor with an un-caged spring brake chamber between his legs while he was loosening the clamp nut. Definitely a Darwin Award contender.

Posted Image

I get a little nervous just working by them...... Posted Image

Clark · April 29, 2009

Just had one in today. '06 4400. This guys air was stuck on the defrost mode. Soooo... he bought and replaced the control head, which didnt fix the problem. Then he bought the actuator, and while trying to replace it, broke it. Then, after buying ANOTHER actuator, he manages to make the center (black) gear in the gear assembly, fall out. Now I have never seen this happen, ever, and judging by how much of a bitch it was to get back in and get timed correctly, I dont think theyre meant to come out with any sort of ease. So I spent 2 1/2 hours fixing something that normaly would take me 30 minutes, using only half the bolts because he lost the rest, and he spent 3x what he would have in parts.

LARRY BRUDZYNSKI · April 29, 2009

Okay guy's this one is priceless...

05 F550 turbo has been junk for a while, he had it at a shop and the tech pulled the bearing housing clamp exhaust side. Brought it in and needed a turbo, asked where the rest was...Still on the truck. Questioned why he didn't bring it all in tech said he didn't need it???WTF!!!! Told him we need all of the turbo core, sold it to him and off he went. He just came back on friday metal shavings everywhere. Customer stated that a local Ford dealer installed a "correct" turbo and mine was not correct, questioned the tech as to why it was wrong had no response. Mind you I have been doing this for a long time, we have seen maybe 1 warranty turbo in the last year. We took the pieces in the back and pulled it apart they/there so called tech assembled it cocked and chewed up the vanes ergo the metal shavings found thru-out the turbo. We showed him this and needless to say I had to get one of the owners involved with this. Customer got quite loud, needless to say, the louder you bitch the more you get. Craig the owner instructed me to credit him back and get the turbo rebuilt again and just restock it. Obviously Craig had enough of this guy and bit the bullet. We have been doing turbos for over 30 years and know quite well how to build them. It really pissed me off and I wanted to shove it up this guys ass, but what do I know...I take pride in what we do and the small amount of comebacks shows it. I will sell this turbo again and will be happy when I save the customer a few bucks to get it and get it done right. Needless to say we have his info saved in the system and will watch for him to come in again...

BrunoWilimek · April 29, 2009

Many years ago at the shop where I apprenticed, a cutomer came in saying his car wouldn't start since he decided to winterize it. He installed a flushing tee and flushed and refilled the antifreeze OK. Then he had some antifreeze left over, so he decided to do the battery as well. He dumped the "water" out of the battery, then filled it with antifreeze. Why wouldn't it start? Another customer built his own trailer and couldn't get the lights to work. On inspection, he had built a nice trailer using wood for the frame, and all the wires were hooked up correctly, right down to the ground wire screwed into the wood frame, yet his lights still didn't work. Another genius bodyman did a bang-up job doing the body on an old K-car. He liberally coated the entire body in body-filler and let it harder up real well, then, without sanding it, he painted the rough surface. He used a saw to cut through the filler at all the body openings so the doors, etc would work. That one gave all of us a good laugh. The car must have had over 100 lbs of filler on it. Posted Image

Aaron · May 1, 2009

The car must have had over 100 lbs of filler on it.

Never see any surface rust on it.... Posted Image

BrunoWilimek · May 1, 2009

I remember a scary looking hitch installation I had e-mailed to me a while ago. I googled it and found a link, so here it is. http://www.jeepaholics.com/support/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=54315 I wonder what that rode like? Posted Image