Jim Warman

Finally... here's my ugly little tool... . It doesn't get much simpler....

Fargin' computers... How do I <insert> an image rather than <link> to it?

Here's what I found once I got the head off...

You are about to get a PM.

We were also promised "perks" from BO certification. We never did see them and I save that fact in the memory bank. At the same time, My DP offers me training that is unheard of in the aftermarket and, apparently, at some dealers... My wages are above average in our area in this industry.... I think this allows me to forgive some oversights. One of the things that polarized how people perceived me on message board is my stance on "gifts".. They are nice to get.... but we shouldn't expect them....

I have the head off one right now (new head finally came in this past week while I was at school). Customer states that he got water and "black floaties" out of the separator. Drained about 30some litres out of the crankcase. With fresh oil, I had a steady miss on cylinder #1 and it didn't run long before it dropped #2. I'm going to download my camera right away... might be something of interest.

The VCM software and the PDS software have to "match".... Latest version is B54 and the VCM disc you rec'd should be all you need (it will load to the PFM proggie on your computer and then, when the PDS is placed in the cradle, the PDS will be updated.... The next time the PDS tool is used, it should update the VCM). Of course, this all depends on if the subscription for the VCM is due or not. When the VCM is purchased, it comes with (IIRC) a two year subscription... after that, somebody, somewhere has to open a chequebook... Each VCM has a unique serial number so there is no opportunity for fudging... I'm not real sure about any of our scan tools anymore... I'm pretty sure that none of them miss any opportunity to "phone home".

Something to consider.... it could be the hand cleaner you use that is one of your worst enemies.... Fast Orange will split my knuckles wide open in less than a week. I'm not a nitrile glove guy.... I'll take my carcinogens straight up, please...

I had an ongoing battle with one fairly "influential" customer... We would unplug his chip and throw it in his cubby hole... All would be well until he looked in the cubbyhole and saw the chip and plugged it back in ... back to the intermittent stalling.... In desparation, I unplugged the chip and kept it.... End of story....

I used to have a toaster that could fast forward a slice of bread into ashes... does that count?

I was getting a redirect to an error 404 (page not found). I know that it had to be my log in because I tried it on at least 5 different computers.... Including the SBTS computer in the shop... right after one of my journeymen logged off of message board. It went like "I'll show you what I..... HOLY SHIT!!!!". I'm still not sure if this was a good idea on Fords part.....

Somewhat off topic but in the same vein.... Keith wont remember this since, IIRC, it was a Canada "po' boy" limp dick pat on the ass... Dwayne SHOULD remember this stuff. First is the monthly tech quiz on InFord... All of the 100% entries were entered into a draw... The whoopie was only 50 bucks.... But it got a lot of guys thinking... and perhaps even learning... Aside from a little "administration" cost, there was $50 a month that Ford had to shell out. I'm sure that the shareholders rejoiced in this "new found" economy... The other that seems to have died was the $50 awarded for winning EDSRs.... Once the name was changed to GCR, the "attaboy" seemed to evaporate. Blue Oval Certified? There was the big hoopla when we first gained certification.... and then? "AH, AH, AH... it feels so..... over..." (Kathleen Turner - from "The Man With Two Brains"). It appears that the "Way Forward" is to save pennies and hope that the dollars will mind themselves. Ford scrapped the Taurus badge.... probably more successful than the pick ups when one considers profit margin... Mullaly brought it back (why ashcan your best seeler?) but it has the chance to be just like the rebirth of the T'Bird. These rocket scientists are too busy f@cking with the stuff that worked for them to realize that they should be experimenting with the stuff that isn't working.... But what the f@ck do I know???? On edit... friggin' typos again.... "Always proof read to be sure left something out"....

Jay... you are right... but you might be wrong, too.... In the shop, I try to do those little extras that do, indeed, "curry favour".... Be it a "word of mouth bonus" or to try to right some mystical "wrong" or to just set us apart from "the crowd". Yes... these acts are performed with "self-interest" in mind.... But thta's what they are designed to do... they set us apart from others. At the same time, there are those civilians that feel they are "owed" these little random acts. When I was self employed, I was often chastised for asking 50 cents for a few feet of wire by someone I had never sen before and knew I would never see again. I started stocking small bubble packs of wire and was criticised for trying to sell those. Obviously, wire was something I bought by the roll simply so I could give it away by the foot.... At the same time, one of our local food stores has a bin marked "Food Bank".... Every time I enter that store, I will pluck something from the shelf simply so I will have something to place in the "Food Bank" bin when I leave.... It might be a can of corn, a flat of cheap soup or a personal hygene product.. but it will be "something". This is one way that I have where I can give without expecting anything in return.... What it boils down to... "that which we sow is what we shall reap...". My random acts of charity in my shops name, should, in some way, benefit my shop. Random personal acts of charity to local charitable or community minded organizations are my little way of thanking Yahweh or Allah or Googly-Moogly or whatever deity for the fact that I can give to them rather than receive from them.... Sheeeit.... the curmudgeon DOES have a heart..... My cover is blown.... FWIW... when you receive "better than average" service from ANYONE... acknowledge it. By all means, if a gratuity is warranted... leave one. But if your experience has truly been exemplary (that might be todays word, boys and girls), mention it. People thrive on recognition.... and verbal acceptance is a powerful tool....

Well, I made it through the Advanced Trans Diag course relatively unscthed.... Being it's such a new course, it does have some rough spots. I was first up for one of the practicals and the bug didn't work as intended... We got that straightened away. The repair was a multiple guess question with only one answer even close to right so I picked it based on sensor data and was told to "complete my diag" first... To keep us from having to get too intrusive with a voltmeter, the voltage reading we would get was printed on a Motorcraft tag hanging near the trans bulkhead connector... I nearly tore the tag off and pitched it in my quest to undo the BH connector (It's a Motorcraft tag hanging on a Ford truck... why would I read the heiroglyphics?)... I had previously erased my right answer and, since this evolution has now run into overtime, I somehow picked an inappropriate answer... Thankfully, I was told to rethink my choice... All the same, this course was probably the hardest of any that I have taken (and I have now, officially, taken them all... save for a very few WBTs). Worthy of mention, the torque adapter calculator (listed under "tech resources" in the right column) and the transmission flow charts I posted the other day are both courtesy of our Edmonton tech training instructor.... He can rejoice that I will no longer darken his door.... Something I forgot to mention.... I went to show him the error message I get when I try to log on to the message board... Lo... and behold!!!! I have, for some reason, been reinstated.... I hope Ford hasn't made a mistake....

I may have misunderstood, leon... and I apologize for that. When we have similar problems with big dollar FQRs, we seem to have to get permission for umpteen offices and people (and, possibly, a note from our mommy) before we get to straighten out their mess. One memorable one was a 7.3 with what appeared to be what was left of three or four of those little anchors for attaching suspended ceiling bars to joists laying on top of a couple of pistons.... Of course it MUST have been US put them there.... That one turned into a f@ck show.

Step away from the motor.... do not do anything other than to report the problem to your supplier..... You procured a motor with the understanding it was ready to run. If you do anything unilaterally, there is every chance that you will own the motor (you may already have crossed that line since you have, in effect, assumed responsibility for someone elses oversight in the ops you have already performed). By removing the head, you have assumed that "someone" is going to pay for gaskets and bolts. And we aren't sure that it wont be you. These sorts of problems desparately need to be addressed in ways that are in accordance with the rebuilders guidelines.... Am I sounding like a dink? Yes.... Hopefully, I sound like a dink that is on your side.... Just stop what you're doing... stop increasing the amount of time you wont get paid for.... Slam dunk the problem right back into the remans lap.... It's his problem... have him deal with it and have him cover any lost time you encounter.... Now... the bad part.... consider every action you take. Consider the reason(s) for that action. If you bought a toaster and it didn't make toast... would you take it back to the store or would you monkey with it? Your new long block doesn't "make toast".... why monkey with it?

Anyone that has to work with automatics may benefit from this resource

OMG!!! I hope there aren't any that wear jewelry at this work?!?!?! Something I earned a long time ago (damned near the "hard" way, thank you) is that jewelry and mechanical repair do not play well together.... There's still a hint of a mark where my wedding ring became a conductor one day and to top it of, when I jerked my hand back, the edge of the ring snagged on something immovable..... I haven't worn jewelry of any kind for well over 20 years.... My wife will attest to the fact that I am married... very, very married....... Watch bands and bracelets share similar attributes... Body piercings?.... No longer my decision to make.... but when it was.... earrings were OK as long as you looked good in a dress. If they look like earrings but but somehow got misplaced in the shuffle.... I can only plead that I am of a generation removed form the current one... I'm not used to these forms of self-mutilation (oopps, I mmeant self-EXPRESSION.... no... really, I did)... and, in an unguarded moment, I may make inappropriate comments on perhaps their size, shape, placement or the fact the do more to make someone look like a pansy-ass than a he-man. But that would be the red-neck coming out in me.... As always, YMMV

Yep... took both web courses.... I thought they would have been a pre-requisite. Strangely, the web scsenarios are one of the work stations for day two. And they don't taste any better the second time around. A lot more time is spent on using PIDs for diagnosing... but the still use the same senseless tests for checking circuit integrity. And half the time, you are testing a circuit AFTER you know it already works....... I mean if I can hear the solenoid click on and of to it's commands... do I NEED to test the circuit? Dang... typos again....

That's a typo, Tony... /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/grin.gif Edmonton can do that to a small town, oilpatch boy... Ef it maks yoo feels betteh, I kan mak up fer et /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smirk.gif For what it's worth, the is the new and improved Advanced Auto Trans course.... I think this is the first time this has been put on in Canada.... Of course some of the "bugs" are not without their glitches... All the same, even though it is only day one, there is some pretty good stuff going on... I thought I was wrong once..... but I was mistaken...

The pulses have me thinking of the possibilty of a pooched vane in the HPOP.... Icp ramps up and when the bad vane comes around, it dumps.... Any crap in the IPR?

Keith.... my DP was one of the first people I told.... I surely didn't want any misunderstandings or the appearance that I was "hiding" something. He laughed and commented that the world (or at least message board) would probably be a safer placw for it... As for the cause of my banishment.... the censors finally got to the old curmudgeon and he snapped.... In retrospect, I suppose it was only a matter of time. It has been mentioned that I appear to have a problem with authority.... In truth, the only problem I have with authority is when it is wielded in a draconian manner... like censorship..... Alex, maybe you could start a "save the fat old redhead" campaign... But we probably are better off leaving sleeping dogs lie. Those chicken-shit little bastards running message board haven't grown the cajones to actually tell me I am personna non gratta... the electronic equvalent of pretending you aren't home.... Speaking of which... I AM not at home.... I am languishing in the West Harvest Inn in Edmonchuk.... Preparing to make Darryl Drummonds life into a nightmare /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smirk.gif for the next three days.... I'm sure he will have some comments to make about my current social status (would it be surprising to know that all the instructors read the message board?).... Andy always takes special pains to make sure I read anything that contains my name....

Do NOT say I didn't warn you.... /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smirk.gif There's the odd time I can get a little cavalier about my personal safety... It becomes a case of "do as I say.... not as I do...". Bad example is me... but, at least that is out in the open and wont haunt me.... My plain side wants to call everyone a bunch of pussies and tell them to "cowboy up". My frosted side, however..... I can't see documenting every little scratch... hell, I thought part of our job description was the ability to "leak" on demand.... Looking at my dainty little hands, I count... lessee - looks like 13 cuts, knicks and scratches... not including the ones I get from playing with the dog... a hundredish pound German Shephard pup.... Anyway... this brave, new world has a few "things" that we didn't have back when Popeye cartoons had Popeye wailing the crap out of Hitler and Tojo.... (remember, until I was six or seven, I had never heard of television). During the 50s, we started to see chemically treated food and packaging.... I started my life without the miracle of butylated hydroxytoluene. Today, this is added to the packaging of all manner of food stuffs to "preserve freshness". I did survive the "red food dye #4" scandal. Purchase a bag of prepared non-organic salad.... cut it open and breathe deeply... you can smell the chemical preservatives. A friend hauled tomatoes out of Nogales... before they closed the trailer doors, they would spray some kind of chemical to retard maturation of the 'maters (why is it that Catsup tastes more like tomatoes than tomatoes do?). Farmers are applying chemicals to crops that literally push the damned things up out of the ground rather than "allowing" them to grow on their own.... Pesticides... herbicides... whatever else that could become part of the food we eat.... Way off topic? read and then judge.... I spent most of my formative years without the miracle of modern food technology. Many reading this are third generation chemical swamps. We have proven, time and again, that we will continue to use questionable products until they fuck us up too bad to ignore (R12 was used as a propellant for spray bombs for many years). I have no known allergies and I'm in pretty good shape for the shape that I'm in. The only times I've ever worn nitrile gloves was during rescue operations with the fire department (blood borne pathogens). There's been the odd time the varsol tank has left my hands feeling "funny"... no biggy, it'll pass... I'll admit to "tasting" something to see if it is sweet like antifreeze or not (no, I'm not drinking a glass of it)... it's what us old guys have always done... BUT.... I don't have the benefit of one or two generations of food additives to contend with... My body chemistry could be quite different from someone half my age... And that difference in chemistry could be a sign that my tolerance for <something> is quite different from another persons tolerance... Ever read the side of a package and notice "MAY contain"? 'scuse me??? MAY contain? What... you @ssholes don't know what you put in there? Can I have a double helping, please? Awareness... This new age is the age of information... Maybe we might be better off without some of it... There's a lot of money to be made from "fear-mongering" and we are the prey. I've been doing a lot of things I shouldn't be doing for a lot of years and it hasn't killed me.... unfortunately, I do have to add the qualifier "yet". All the same, some of the stuff we hear/read/are told could be a lot of overkill. The pendulum swings from one extreme to the other... spending only the briefest moment in the middle. If someone feels better for wearing gloves... nitrile or pit.... if they feel better wearing a particle dust mask... ear plugs (too late for me but I always did like a good rock concert and cheap smoke)... or whatever else for safety equipment.. By all means. There is no reason to cause yourself worry. After that... stop yer friggin whimpering /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/crybaby2.gif, cowboy up and get the hell back to work...... /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/grin.gif

I started to reply with my thoughts... it started getting long (no surprises there). Anyone want to read the old fools rantings?

Your situation is one I had suggested during wage negotitations but it was passed over as being too difficult to administer... Hence, I am in a far better situation (not-withstanding the need to document my time VERY carefully to avoid misunderstandings) than I ever thought. Two thoughts. Guys like you and me are there for these "iffy" things.... our time can be assigned to anything the powers that be decide to assign it to... "internal", "good will", whatever. Most techs are paid flat rate... piece work, if you will... Can we expect the dealer to come "good" on a freeby if the tech isn't going to share in the act? Where do we draw the line? What would be considered "politically correct" (GAWD, I hate that term /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/sick.gif ). When I was on the bench, I would often take more than my fair share of "one for the team" simply because I dislike disharmony. So I lost a couple of thousand bucks over the course of a year.... It's only fucking money and if that is the main goal in life, someone has missed the boat. I didn't set out with "good money" as my goal in life. I set out with "good work" as my goal.... The money part is taking care of itself.... just as long as I don't forget my main goal. The flat rate guys are, in reality, marching to the beat of a different drummer. We can't demand that they do something for free (other than the report cards... but there is always the chance of an "Easter egg" there....). BUT... would they be willing to step up to the plate and participate in any good-will efforts? Or am I all f@cked up thinking that "team effort" is anything more than a slogan? If my store is successful, then I will share in that success (and if the DP doesn't realize that, why would I stay?). But... the success of my store depends, in part, on me.... Some days you're the dog.... and some days you're the fire hydrant. You should thank me... I almost made you use dictionary.com again... but decided to keep it simple /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smirk.gif On edit... that's "elucidate"... not "eludicate". Editting the the edit... it can be difficult to be seen as erudite /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/grin.gif